The act of spontaneity...

After exactly one month away I am now home (London, UK). I had a lot of time during my travels to reflect and be present to myself and my life.

What I started to think strongly about was spontaneity. My conclusion was that we each need to have acts of spontaneity that gives excitement to our existence. This could be small acts on a day to day basis, or something much bigger.

Yet when we think about spontaneity another act also exists in parallel. And that is of "fear". So thinking about spontaneity and fear, I started to wonder "how do we not let fear rule our lives? And with that maintain a sense of excitement about the lives we live?"

For me it does come down to a level of spontaneity and taking action (but without going crazy - we all do have bills to pay and other responsibilities) - but also recognising when and where fear is justified. We each have our 'comfort zones' - areas where our boundaries lie. But it is at the edge of these boundaries where - if you could understand the difference between the fear that you are experiencing - that could really help you breakout and explore human life some more.

Personally I do try and live my hearts desire and push boundaries, yet - at times - there is a sense of fear that steps in. Over the years the key for me is recognising the difference with the fear that is trying to protect me and the fear that is simply holding me back. (I have noticed that the fear that is holding me back is either because of a sense of danger (hence that is a positive protection) or because of fear of judgement (this is a negative protection). So how do I differentiate between the two fears, and the types of fears? Well, I've had to really become aware of the gut feeling - within my body - as to which one is (truly) trying to keep me safe and which one is just 'false evidence appearing real' (I heard this acronym years ago and it struck a cord). A lot of false evidence is related to what society asks of you. Do this, do that. Do it this way, do it that way, etc etc.

I have been in situations where I've felt very uneasy taking an action - yet to the outside world it's a no-brainer. This is where it is important to go within and truly sit with your gut and feel what is right - FOR YOU. Equally I have had situations where to me something has felt right and to the outside world it was a crazy decision. One example I can think of is when the economic crash was happening around 2008, I finished a work contract, not knowing what was next. At the time people's advise was to keep the job, when I was feeling that it was time to end that particular role (or in fact not accept the extension). It just felt right. My body was calm with the decision. There was no uneasiness in me. I have realised that if I listen to the outside world too much (or fear about the judgement of others) it can cause me to worry a lot more and with experience I tend to lose my sense of self. I really can also get trapped in the human mind and feel low about life (something I am learning to break away from on a daily basis). Also if there is uneasiness within me - on taking any particular action - it's a reminder that I really need to go within to feel why that is (is it positive or negative).

This last action I took that was related to spontaneity was this last trip that I have just returned from. This trip was never planned in the way it has turned out to be, as it was booked in a sequence of spontaneous acts. Firstly a friend of mine asked me to accompany her to Mumbai - mainly as I had visited the city many times before and knew the places to go and as I had yet to fully experience the night life in that city - I accepted. Some time later I realised the first grand slam of the season The Australian Open Tennis was on at the time that we would be in Mumbai. I felt my soul dance as I went ahead and booked the quarterfinal tickets - and this too with a quick look at potential flight costs (note: even with spontaneous acts you have to try and be practical to your own financial and life situation). A few days after that I looked into connecting flights. Only then realising that I needed to transit somewhere. I became excited at the thought of stopping in either Malaysia or Singapore for a few days. I selected Singapore. And only post that I remembered an old work connection who was currently living in Singapore. I emailed him and it was great that we were able to meet and he was able to show me the real Singaporean food. Synchronicity then led me to releasing that the Indian cricket team would be in Melbourne at the time I was intending to be there. My beaming excitement led me to book that event! Lastly, while in Mumbai, I was reminded of a friends hen party happening in Dubai. I initially had to turn that down due to work. At this point, when I looked at my dates of travelling between India, Singapore and Australia - I realised I could make this work! So then I added Dubai just before I flew out to Singapore and Melbourne. In between this the various airlines were accomodating in changing flights (the effortless booking was highly welcome and a sign to me that this was meant to happen).

With all of the above taking place, my only point of reference was that I wanted to be back in London for the BAFTAs weekend. So anything before that I was open to let synchronicity and life play out.

On a day to day basis we can all have acts of spontaneity. Deciding to break away from routine in a way is a spontaneous act. From simple things such as getting off a tube stop earlier and walking the rest. The way to go about carrying out spontaneous acts is to learn to "check-in with yourself". Let's say you're in a coffee shop about to get your regular coffee order. Now, being in auto suggestive mode you will get the same order, but if you are truly present to your now, check in with yourself and see if some other choice that might be the way to go, for a change.

I also recall - from a few years back - booking a random day trip away to another city that I had never been before. I just felt like doing this. What was to come of that (and remember that you can only join-the-dots later on) was the meeting of another soul who turned out to be an important experience for me.

Basically you just never know - but the way to feel alive today is to be present and bring a little spontaneity into your actions. I do think that carrying out small acts of spontaneity either within your day or week is vital to feeling alive. It is those small/large acts that make your soul dance and excited to be in the here and now.